Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Will You Pee In A Cup For My Friend?

So I'm getting ready for work this morning, and the phone rings, it's my business ring so I figure it's either a customer or a telemarketer (that's the only number of our 2 that is listed so telemarketers and survey people call that one). I look at the caller ID and it's a customer, probably asking if I'm open yet, so I answer, This is about the gist of our conversation:

Her: "Hey, you know, you're one of only 2 people I know around here who aren't like a total Crack Whore or something" (and I'm thinking like "oh cool, I've managed to avoid the local stereo type!")

Me: "Ok, yeah" (laughing)

Her: "So I have an ODD request, I have this friend who is on probation, and she has to see her probation officer and she needs someone to pee in a cup for her..." (Ummmm....... seriously?)

Me: (Stumped and stalling for time) "What exactly are they testing her for?" (Racking my brain for an excuse NOT to break the law, without totally pissing this chick off cause I don't know her very well and she's a good customer, and I need the money, LOL!)

Her: "Oh, things like Pot, Coke, Opiates, stuff like that."

Me: (IDEA!) "Oh, shit, I don't think I can... I'm on some prescription pain killers." (SHIT, remembering this chick used to work in a Drs office.... racking my brain for a name)

Her: "Oh, which one?"

Me: (Finally thinking of something I DO have a prescription for) "Tylenol 3, I don't think the test would come out clean cause it has Codeine in it."

Her: "Shit, you're right"

Me: "Sorry!"

Her: (Laughing) "It's ok, Thanks anyway!"


Ummm. WOW! I immediately called my mom to tell her about that one, LOL. My husband is gonna have a fucking BLAST with this one LMAO...!


Steven said...

I cannot believe you would not help out one of your customers. She needed a friend and turned to you lol.

Mamacakes said...

Oh, you're amusing... Not risking MY neck to help someone break the law...

Wondering about the quality of people I am serving through my business though if SHE couldn't provide a clean urine sample for her own friend, HAHAHA!