Monday, August 20, 2012

It's My Anniversary! 6 Years Of Bliss!

6 years ago today, I left an abusive husband, packed up my 2 kids and my very pregnant self, despite because of his death threats and left.

I had no idea where I was going, or what I was going to do, but I did it, and I don't know where we would be if I hadn't made that decision.I remember the 1 year anniversary of this day. It hit me like a ton of bricks how much my life had changed, how much of a stronger person I had become because of my decision to leave.

Saturday, August 18, 2012

I suck at being sober...

[caption id="attachment_456" align="alignright" width="300"] I'll never see this view without thinking of my grandmother[/caption]

To be fair with myself, I was only sober for just over a month. Three weeks in, on a Monday, I got a phone call from my step-mother, my grandmother had just passed away. My grandmother, the woman who lived next door through my entire childhood, the woman I spent the 4th of July with, I had JUST seen her. A picture of she and my grandfather has a permanent residence on my living room shelf. I felt like everything in my life had shattered. Ironically, I had just, days before this, written about the last time in my life that I felt this broken. I couldn't have imagined what I was about to experience.That entire week was awful, I couldn't get off my couch for more than a few minutes at a time, I wandered around aimlessly, trying to find some meaning, trying to forget that in an instant, I could lose any of the people I love most.There were a lot of tears.